Vital: Understanding and Applying the Basic Components of Communication
There are four basic components of communication. If you are aware of them and apply them correctly, you will achieve your aims when you disseminate truth to people. When you do not achieve your aims, you have always violated at least one of these basic components. Therefore, it is essential for you to comprehend and apply them correctly at all times. These are:
Affinity: Degree of liking or the willingness of a person to “share space” with another.
Agreement: What individuals have in common based on each individual’s point of view and what each considers to be real
Communication: In its ideal sense, communication is the transferring of an idea from one individual to another or others in such a way that the idea is completely understood.
Understanding: Duplication of the communication by the receiver of the communication.
The simple formula for these is: AFFINITY + AGREEMENT = COMMUNICATION = UNDERSTANDING
There are no absolutes in communications. Therefore, your goal as the communicator is to gain as close as possible to absolute understanding as possible with the individual you are talking to. To achieve this, all you need to do is increase the level of affinity or agreement in your communications and greater understanding will always automatically occur. To achieve this, you should adhere to these communication musts.
- Look attractive: Dress appropriately and maintain your best possible appearance. If you go to an event that expects you to dress in business attire, do so. Look attractive. Attraction is affinity and automatically increases the other components of communication.
- Ask questions as early as possible in your conversation: Questions enable you to determine the individual’s reality… what the person is in agreement with. This will help formulate how you will move foreword with the conversation.
- Never invalidate the individual for his point of view: This destroys affinity and agreement, as an invalidation is always a disagreement. Watch How to Share Difficult Information with Friends without Losing Friendships. Foster and Kimberly do a wonderful job of explaining how to avoid this. However, you can attack an argument that an individual supports, but you must make sure you carefully do so! Foster and Kimberly cover this brilliantly.
- Communicate from the person’s point of view: As an example, if the individual has young children, explain how understanding the New World Order can help this person protect and continue to provide for his children.
- Never try to prove the other person wrong. Keep your ego out the door. You might win the argument and create such a break in communication that the individual may never wish to talk to you again.
- Maintain an interested rather than interesting attitude: Doing so shows the individual you care about him, which automatically increases affinity.
- Focus your attention on the individual: If the person pulls away from you, he disagreed with something you said and the level of affinity dropped. In other words, he lost some interest in being in your space. If the person yawns, something you said was not understood. If the person deliberately looks away from you, you said something to anger him. In each of these cases, you must clear up the situation by asked questions like, was I clear in what I said? (Place the responsibility for the issue on you, not the person you are communicating to). If he starts looking elsewhere besides at you, he is bored, which means you are no longer being perceived as being interested or you said something that was not understood. In this case, ask him some questions about what you just said with an interested tone.
- Never argue. If the individual is incapable of understanding what you say or is brainwashed and his belief system is wacky, just warmly thank him, wish him well and go talk to someone else.
- Never cut people off when they are talking, listen carefully and always acknowledge that you understood them as soon as they are through speaking: Failure to do so always lowers affinity as causes people to believe you don’t respect them. As a result, people can get angry.
- Remain focused on them and attentive: This also demonstrates that you are interested and value them. Staying focused helps raise affinity and agreement.
- Deliver your message with confidence and a strong belief that your message will be heard, understood and agreed with. People will be more inclined to respect you and believe your point of view in your intention is strong.
If you have any questions concerning these, please feel free to post something here or e-mail us.